Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Funny customer service moments

Posted by Simcha 12:42 PM, under | 11 comments

This is a bit off topic but I couldn't resist sharing this really funny site that I came across today called The Customer is not Always Right where employees from around the world share their humorous experiences in customer service.

These are a few of my favorites:

Not So Beautiful Mind
Bookstore | Alberta, Canada

Customer: “Hi, I’m looking for a book based off a movie. Life is Beautiful, I think?”

Me: “I don’t believe Life is Beautiful” was originally a book. Are you perhaps thinking of A Beautiful Mind?”

Customer: “Yes! Yes that’s the one! Get me that one! It’s the one about World War II. And the guy is burned. And there’s a French Nurse. That’s the book I want!”

Me: “That actually sounds like The English Patient by Michael Ondaatje. I can grab a copy of that for you!”

Customer: “Yes! The English Patient. That sounds right. But Michael Ondaatje, that sounds like a foreign name. No, The English Patient wasn’t written by a foreigner. Do you have a copy that wasn’t written by Ondaatje? I want that story, but I want it written by a Canadian.”

Me: “So you want a copy of The English Patient that is not written by Michael Ondaatje?”

Customer: “Yes! That’s what I want. Do you have any copies of that story written by Margaret Atwood? I do like her.”

Me: “No. I really don’t think we do.”

Customer: “Oh. Do you think any of your other stores might?”

Me: “I doubt it, ma’am.”




Early Bird-Brained
Supermarket | New Zealand

(I am at work doing a before-opening clean of the trolley handles and checkout counters.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I’d like to buy these now please.”

Me: “Um, ma’am, I’m not a checkout operator.”

Customer: “Yes, but I’m here now and I’m running late, so can you just run these through the scanner for me?”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s five thirty. There are no checkout operators as we don’t open for another hour and a half.”

Customer: “Oh, I was wondering why there wasn’t anyone in the Deli, but that’s okay because I went back behind the counter and got the ham out the freezer.”

Me: “Ma’am, you’re not allowed to do that. How did you get in? The doors are locked until the security guard gets here.”

Customer: “Oh, I broke the window because I thought your door wasn’t working. Can you run these through for me now?”


Fish Trek 2: It All Goes Downstream From Here
Bookstore | Colorado, USAColorado, USA

Customer: “This book looks interesting. How do I watch it?”

Me: “Watch it?”

Customer: “Yes, where can I find the movie?”

Me: “I don’t think this book has been adapted into a movie.”

Customer: “What do you mean? Where can I go to watch it? I want to know what happens in the book!”

Me: “Forgive me for asking, but if you want to know what happens, why not just read it?”

Customer: “Read? How stupid! Where’s the movie! All books are made into movies so that we don’t have to read them!”

Me: “I am sorry, I can’t help you. This is a bookstore. Only popular books–usually adventure stories–are adapted into movies. I am quite sure that this book hasn’t been made into a movie.”

Customer: “Why not?!”

Me: “Because it’s a fishing manual.”


The Point Of No Return
Video Rental | Ann Arbor, MI, USA

Me: “Thank you for calling. How can I help you?”

Customer: “You charged my credit card forty five dollars. Can I get a refund?”

(I pull up his account.)

Me: “Okay. I see that you rented two movies that were never returned and you were charged the sale price of the movies.”

Customer: “Well, I was on vacation and I forgot to return them on time.”

Me:“Let me go check the shelves for them; it’s possible that they didn’t get checked in properly. If I find them I can put a credit on your account that you can use whenever you’re in the store next.”

Customer: “I didn’t return them.”

(It’s been over two months since the movies were originally due.)

Me:“You didn’t return them?”

Customer: “Nope.”

Me:“Sir, you would like me to pay you for renting movies and never bringing them back?”

Customer: “Uh huh.”

Me: “I’m not going to do that.”

Customer: “Okay…I just thought I’d ask.”


Twilight Vs Holy Light
Bookstore | Chicago, IL, USA

(A young woman, about 20 years old, comes up to the counter holding a copy of The Bible.)

Me: “Hi, did you find everything you needed today?”

Customer: “Yeah, hey, can you tell me what this is about?”

Me: “The Bible?”

Customer: “Yeah, what’s it about?”

Me: “The Bible has two parts, the Old Testament which is scriptures and the New Testament, which contains the story of Jesus’ life and works as told through the gospels, written by Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.”

Customer: “Huh. Is it any good?”

Me: “It’s pretty popular.”

Customer: “Nah, I’ll just get this one instead.” *puts a copy of Twilight on the counter*


You can check out this site for yourself at http://notalwaysright.com, though I warn you that it's very addictive.

11 comments:

This is one of my favourite blogs though it drives everyone crazy when I keep bursting in laughter!

My favorite is the last one.

this is great! thanks for sharing simcha... i'm off to the website to read more :D

Oh man, that is freaking awesome! I love and curse you for this! Awesome, but there goes my afternoon!!

-Bryan
www.sff-hub.com

These are bringing back terrible memories of my days in customer service...

Are people really that stupid? Unfortunately - yes.

Hilarious! Thanks for sharing this, too!

Oh my... I spent way to much time there. Great blog!

Esther: Maybe you are the person that posted something from this site on Facebook, which led me to it. If you are then I totally blame you for all the time I wasted yesterday on this site instead of getting work done.

Bryce: No problem. You did introduce me to that book cover site, after all..

Riv Re: yes, that is a funny one. Twilight or the Bible? Hmm...

chelleyreads: Just don't say I didn't warn you about how addictive the site is..

BStearns & WonderBunny: Well, since I wasted so much of my time there yesterday the only thing to make me feel better is to drag others down with me.

Stephanie: And these aren't even the worst of them. Some of them were to painful to believe.

Aleksandra: My pleasure!

Aha!!!! Time to get even for you having made me waste a day with this hilarious, gem of a site. This one is full of horrifying, hilarious things. Check it out. http://www.fmylife.com/

And of course, thanks for the customer service one!

-Bryan
www.sff-hub.com

Bryan: Trying to exact revenge are you? Well I prepared myself by making sure all my work was done before taking a look at this site you linked to. There is some crazy stuff there. Now I know where to turn to when I have a bad day, because I'm sure to find someone there who will make my day look like just fine.

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